“Love is an infinite giving of yourself.” Then why do I feel like I’m begging for love? Why this enormous sadness of wanting in and being left outside? Why the tears and the pain? Why the pain? Is there a final purpose? Is there a threshold we need to pass so finally, someone can say: ok, you’ve hurt enough?
I feel like a broken shell, wore out by the sea. I feel like I’ve lived for thousands of years and touched all that I can. I feel like I have thrown myself in the waves, trusted in their battle, believed in their deepness, but I’m nowhere. Nobody can find me, I hear myself crying for a touch, but nobody hears me. There is too much noise in the world, touches don’t have feelings, lives don’t have an end, hearts don’t have miracles.
I want everything to shut up. I want peace and silence, I want to feel that I’m not broken, whole again in the eyes of an innocent child. Pick me up, I’ll give you softness and love, colors and laugh, light from thousands years ago. Can you hear me?
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